Blonds with blue eyes

Dating After Getting Divorced

I started dating after getting divorced too early. I guess that wisdom comes through our life experiences. I know that I had read somewhere that it is a good idea to wait a couple of years before starting to date. I was in so much emotional pain that I made the choice to early and paid the price later. The price was so high that it left me with another huge scar on my heart. Entrusting our hearts early to another, after divorcing,   is a dangerous thing.  When we have emotional tears on it from relationships gone bad , we are less able to give of ourselves completely because the wounds are still fresh. Doesn't this make since. If a football player seriously  injures his or her leg there is a required amount of time for that leg to heal. Even more importantly the player must have a doctors approval to be a starter on the team again. I did not consult anyone about dating again. My heart was torn and I didn't even have a therapist who could tell me it was to soon to get back in the game.

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If you have asked yourself the question, how long should I wait to date after getting divorced?  Here's an interesting view point. I heard this several years ago from a wise man and did not follow his advice, thus I experienced divorce for the second time. He explained to me that this live experience was very much like grieving the death of a loved one, in fact he even referenced a book about how similar in nature that these two events are. I got the book and discovered that clinical research reveals that we should allow three years for the grieving process to run it's full course. Three years may seem like a long time to wait but having an emotional tear upon our hearts could be compared to having that broken leg for life. If we do not treat it properly we may always be crippled in ever relationship afterwards.
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Relationships After Getting Divorced

How long should I wait to date after getting divorced?

All about daing
I have since learned, after being divorced a second time,  that the best way to build lasting relationships after getting divorced is by interacting in groups of other singles. I do not mean interacting in local bars either. If we find ourselves in those types of places the main focus is to get connected with someone and very often this leads to one night stands. Which by the way is like giving a very valuable piece of your self away to a stranger. Imagine just for a moment if your body was covered with $100 dollar bills. Every time we sleep with someone, in a one night stand situation, it's like giving them one of those $100 dollar bills.To interact in safe singles groups may require seeking out a local church or  community group of like minded people. Internet dating is a good way to build safe relationships if it is kept they are kept online and not pursued off line.  Entering into serious love relationships with the opposite sex to soon after getting divorced will only leave us with more scars upon our hearts. Guard your heart until it is healed.
Relationships should be entered into slowly after divorce. Getting to anxious and not taking time to wait before starting to date  is a long  path that leads to certain destruction. I cannot tell you exactly how long  the set time is  for waiting before we start dating. The comparison to grieving a loved one sure does make sense to me though. Should you decided to give yourself some time, remember the old cliché “time heals all things.” There is always a silver lining to be found once the storm  are over.